Winter

I can't quite explain how this Psalm from today's devotion made me reflect on something I had written last year when reflecting on 1 Corinthians 8 &9, but that is where I was led today.

"Thou hast made summer and winter."  Psalm 74:17
"Winter in the soul is by no means a comfortable season, and if it be upun thee just now it will be very painful to thee:  but there is this comfort, namely, that the Lord makes it.  He sends the sharp blasts of adversity to nip the buds of expectation:  He scattereth the hoarfrost like ashes over the once verdant meadows of joy:  He casteth forth His ice like morsels freezing the streams of delight.  He does it all, He is the great Winter King, and rules in the realms of frost, and therefore thou canst not murmur.  Losses, crosses, heaviness, sickness, poverty, and a thousand other ills, are of the Lord's sending, and come to us with wise design.  Frosts kill noxious insects, and put a bound to raging disease; they break up the clods, and sweeeten the soul.  O that such good results would always follow our winters of affliction!" (Spurgeon)

During our coldest winter months, we didn't have physical or mental strength to keep up with, really, anything.   We lived day to day, putting one foot in front of the other, mostly because stoppng was too scary an option. Eric's health was painfully on edge (physically and mentally), and I had no idea what to do or even what help to ask for.  Everything felt too draining.  The lists of things we had that had made us who we were, great things, were stripped.  We were bare.  (And being naked in Vermont can be a very cold place.)  There was nothing to define us but who we really were.  No church attendance card, no friends or family near-by, no awesome jobs; we were very exposed.  And it felt awkward; not having a way to cover ourselves up.  But now I see the freedom it brought.  Now I can see the True garments cloaking us.  Without the cool wardrobe, without defining hobbies, God could pour into us in a way we had not allowed Him to before.  Before we thought we were being gracious if we allowed God to be a part of those "things."  Now, as some "things" (a church, nearness to family and friends, more community) are being added back to our lives we know that God is not just a part of those things, He is all of it.

When I look back I see Him.  I see a sweet yellow house, the outside light always turned on, snow piled up under windows like a big ol' comforter of cozy.  I see bright green, old, rolling mountains in summer and flowers so rich in color they look like they might start dripping yellow and pink and green.  I see a good, true friend sitting with Eric while I go to pick up medicine, or coming by with notes from class.  I see Christ.  I see Him ministering to us in every detail of those cold, frosty years.

So, "Let us in the same manner prize our Lord, who is the constant source of warmth and comfort in every time of trouble.  Let us draw nigh to Him, and in Him find joy and peace in believing.  Let us wrap ourselves in the warm garments of His promises, and go forth to labours that befit the season, for it were ill to be as the sluggard who will not plough by reason of the cold; for he shall beg in summer and have nothing." (Spurgeon)